Hi there
Thanks for your letter, you have told me a lot about your life and the things that are making you feel unhappy, and it sounds like you are feeling a lot of pressure at the moment and things are hard both at home and at school and sometimes when things are hard everywhere, it can make life seem really difficult.
You say that you are worried about your weight - this is something that a lot of people your age tell me they feel, and many young people worry about how they look as their body changes and grows. Perhaps you could speak to your doctor or school nurse as they will be able to advise you about what your weight should be. They can also help you to think about ways you could lose weight healthily and safely, by helping you to come up with a healthy eating and exercise plan. You have told me about some of the things that you don’t like about the way you look, and sometimes it can be easy to think more about the things you don’t like, rather than the things you do. Is there anything you do like about the way you look? Focusing on the things you do like can sometimes be a really good way of boosting your self-esteem and confidence, as everyone has an individual style and that’s what makes everyone unique.
It sounds really hard that you feel that your family leaves you out and you feel that they don’t care about you. All children should be able to feel like they have people to care for them at home. How would it feel to talk to your family about the way they make you feel? This may help you to get your point across and let them know how you feel. If you are not sure what you might say, you can talk this through with a Childline counsellor who could help you to think about how might be best to talk to them and what you might like to say.
You say that you are getting bullied, and no one should have to experience this, and no one has the right to make you feel bad. There are lots of people who can support you with the bullying and you can take a look at our pages about bullying which is a great place to start to help you to think about what you might be able to do to keep yourself safe.
Starting a new school can be a really scary thing to do, and many people feel worried about the new experiences. Often secondary school will mean a lot of changes, like lots of new people to get to know, more homework, a different school and different routines. This is something that you might need to give yourself more time to get used to. If you really feel that you don’t like your new school, perhaps you could talk to a teacher you trust, to let them know how you feel and they might be able to suggest ways that you might be able to enjoy school more. Joining a club at school can be really good way to get to know people and you might find something that you enjoy doing too, which might help you to feel less bored. Perhaps you could see what clubs run in your school and have a think if there are any you would like to join.
If you are still feeling that you would like to talk anything through you can always talk to a Childline counsellor who will be there to listen and to support you to think about these problems you are facing at the moment. You don’t have to go through this alone as there is always someone friendly at ChildLine who will be there to talk whenever you feel ready. You can contact them online, by signing up for an account and either sending an email, having an online 1-2-1 chat (which is a bit like MSN) or by phone on 0800 1111 and that’s a free phone number that doesn’t show up on any bill and is free from all UK phones including mobiles.
Take care
Sam