Hi there
I imagine it took a lot of courage to write to me about this, so I just wanted to say thanks for being so brave.
It is understandable that your parents’ behaviour really upsets you. I expect that it feels uncomfortable to be in the middle of what’s happening. I also hear how you feel they may never be friends again and that’s a difficult thing to think about.
Sometimes when parents end their relationship, they can become so involved in their differences that they are not thinking as much as they should, about the other important things in their life, such as their young people, and that is really unfair.
Your parents should make arrangements over who you should stay with on what days, in a reasonable way, without making you feel uncomfortable. If they can’t agree on this without arguing, then it is possible for a professional like a social worker to help them deal with the arrangements.
I’m wondering whether your parents realise how much all this is worrying you. How would you feel about talking to one of them? If speaking to them feels difficult, maybe you could write a letter. Writing a letter can be a good way of letting someone know how you feel and you can take as much time as you need to write the things you really want to say.
If you believe your parents might not react well to what you would like to tell them, maybe you could talk to another adult who you trust?
You might find it helpful to speak to a ChildLine counsellor about this. They would support you by helping you to explore what’s happening, the way you feel and work out with you what to do next. You can ring ChildLine for free on 0800 1111, email or have a 1-2-1 chat online with a counsellor (like msn).
You might also like to take a look at the Explore section of the ChildLine website where there is a section which gives information about divorce and separation. The message boards are also useful as they are a way of young people supporting one another, through similar situations and difficulties.
I do hope you will stay in touch with ChildLine and let us help you to find a way forward.
Thanks again for writing to me.
Take Care,
Sam