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Topic Dad's partner 

Question

To Sam 

11/05/2011 5:29pm 

Dad's partner 

Hi, 7 years ago my parents split up and then 3 years ago my dad got remarried. Though what made me really upset was that he didn't tell me until a year later. I still get really upset and a few months ago my dad arranged to move into a shared house and his wife disappeared off to Brazil. Now my mum doesn't want us to stay in his house because she thinks the other people there might me really horrible. I know she's right but it is so annoying and no one tells me anything that's new going on. My mum is on the phone to my dad a lot when I'm in bed but she keeps it secret. I'm so confused and i think i think about it too much. There's so much going on as well with SAT's.

I just really need some advice,

Gabysof  

Sam's answer

Sam 

19/05/2011 9:46am 

Hi

Thank you for your letter. It sounds like there’s a lot going on for you right now with your family and at school.

I can hear that you’re feeling very confused and upset about your parents divorce and how your relationship has changed with your dad, and that you feel as though you’re thinking about everything that’s happening too much.

It sounds as though you haven’t been able to find an opportunity to talk through how you feel about what’s happening between your mum and dad. It’s understandable that you get annoyed when no one tells you anything new that’s going on. This is a lot to cope with on your own - your feelings are very important too.

How would you feel if you wrote a letter to your mum and your dad? It may be helpful to write down how you’re feeling and have the chance to ask them some of the questions you haven’t been able to ask up until now. Sometimes being able to talk about things can be helpful instead of keeping everything inside.

If you don’t feel ready to speak to your parents or write to them both, maybe you’d like to talk things through with a ChildLine counsellor?

You can ring 0800 1111 to talk to a counsellor directly; calls are free and won't show up on the phone bill, including mobiles. You can also have a 1-2-1 chat with a counsellor online or send them an email. Talking with a counsellor could help you to get a better understanding of how things are and begin to think of ways that you can support yourself at home and with your exams at school.

We are here whenever you want to talk to someone and I hope we hear from you again when you’re ready.

Take care

Sam

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