Hi Heather,
Thank you for you letter and for telling me how you are feeling at the moment.
You have done very well to accept that you are a lesbian and to have taken the difficult step to talk to your friend and your dad about it. Some families and friends can find it hard to understand what they are being told, and sometimes it can take them a long time to accept who you are. It is difficult when you tell someone you trust and they don't react in the way in which you had hoped.
You say that going through life without your friend will be too miserable to think about. I wonder how you would feel speaking to your friend and telling her how much her friendship means to you?
Sometimes gay or lesbian young people can feel lonely because it feels like you are different from everyone else, but there are many gay or lesbian people out there who may have similar feelings. You might find it useful to look at Teen Issues (UK) and specifically the friends and relationships section, which provides useful information and support. You might also like to look at the ChildLine information page about sexuality.
You mention that your course work is building up and you can’t keep up with it. If you could talk to someone at college about this, it might be possible to get some support or even some of the deadlines extended.
Also please remember that if you'd like to speak more about how you're feeling and what is going on with you, you could talk to a ChildLine counsellor on the free phone number 0800 1111, or by online chat or send them an email via the ChildLine website. ChildLine is always there to listen to you and support you.
Take care and I hope this helps
Sam