Hi there
First of all, I want you to know that it does not sound like you are just complaining. It sounds like there’s been a lot going on for you: in particular, it sounds like there have been lots of changes in different relationships in your life and that it’s been really upsetting you, making you feel very depressed and always tearful.
You write about missing your dad because he’s not at home much. Missing someone can be really difficult. How we feel when people are away can also depend on our relationships with people when they are around. Although it is not the same as having your dad at home more, maybe you could also think about if there are ways that you could stay in touch with him more. For example you could try and arrange specific times with him every week where you talk to him.
Although you say that sometimes your sister isn’t that bad, it seems like her tantrums, crying, screaming, not leaving you alone when you want time by yourself and being rude to your friends have been annoying and upsetting you a lot recently. Feeling like this about a family member can be really hard. Maybe you could think about ways that you might find it easier to cope when your sister is being like this. For example, some people might find that listening to music can be quite helpful to take a break from difficult situations, but it’s important that you find something that is right for you. When it might be difficult to get away when your sister is acting like this, you could also think about writing down your thoughts and feelings afterwards, thinking about how you reacted and what you might have liked to have done differently or to have been different in that situation.
It sounds like you’re a very caring friend. You talk about not wanting to be jealous or sad about your friend getting a puppy if you didn’t get a dog yourself. It sounds like you really loved and miss your puppy and that re-homing him was a real loss. It’s OK to have these feelings and sometimes it can also help to find ways to remember those that we have lost. For example, one option might be to create a ‘memory book’ of drawings, photos, poems, stories, anything at all that helps you to remember the good times that you had with your puppy. Again, though, it’s important to remember that you find a way to cope that makes sense to you.
Sometimes talking to others about our feelings and what is going on can help. Remember that ChildLine is here to listen to and support you and that you can contact a ChildLine counsellor by private email, 1-2-1 chat, and by phone (0800 11 11).
Take care,
Sam