Hello
Thank you for taking the time to write to me and for being so honest about how hard things are for you right now. At Childline, we know a lot of young people wonder if what they’re telling us will seem a bit stupid or that we’ll think they are a bit "mental". In fact, we don’t think that at all.
To not have had your older brother around for the last two years sounds really difficult. It’s clear you were close and that you felt safe with him. Also, I know there often are complicated reasons why a young person can feel depressed, not want to eat, self harm and think about being dead. It sounds like right now you are overwhelmed by feelings (including pain and hurt), some of which may be too hard to put into words. Sometimes how we think of ourselves and talk to ourselves in our head can make us feel quite desperate. But none of this means that it’s your fault.
If this letter gets just one point across, I hope it is that ChildLine cares about you and doesn’t want you to feel so alone with your feelings. Our counsellors regularly talk to young people who are feeling depressed, self harming and having eating issues. We take everything said to us seriously, never judge the person we’re talking to and offer as much support as we can.
If you could contact us, you could get much more support from us than this letter can give. If you feel able to talk, you could call for free on 0800 1111 any time of the day or night. If you don’t feel able to talk and prefer to get to know us online, you can use our website to go online for a chat (messaging) with a counsellor. Remember, what you tell us is confidential – meaning that we don’t tell anyone what you say and we don’t take action unless we think you or someone you know is in immediate danger.
Also, I hope you’ve seen the Message Boards on our website, where young people offer each other support about a range of complicated issues. This may help you feel less alone too.
Take care
Sam