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Relationships

Having a boyfriend or girlfriend for the first time is really exciting, but it can be scary too. It's normal to have worries about it and what will happen in the future. Taking a chance is part of life and it's also part of relationships, but it's important to stay safe and happy.

Boy and a girl sitting on a bench, the boy has his arm around herWhat kinds of things do people worry about in relationships?

When you start going out with someone, even if you started out as friends, there are lots of new things to learn about the other person. This can be worrying and you might feel a bit odd or have emotions that you haven't had before. Things that you worry about might be:

  • Does he/she really like me?
  • Will the relationship last?
  • Will he/she be faithful to me?
  • Should we have sex?

It's natural to worry about some or all these things.

If you are really worried about your relationship you could talk to your boyfriend/girlfriend about how you feel. If you feel like you can't talk to them you can call us about any problems you might have.

Should I have sex with my boyfriend/girlfriend?

Having sex is a big decision and there are lots of things to think about if you are considering doing it. You can read more about sex and relationships. You can also speak to other young people on the Sex and Relationships message board.

Can I speak to ChildLine confidentially about sex and relationships?

You can speak to a ChildLine counsellor about anything that is on your mind and we will not tell anyone else about what you've said. You can contact ChildLine either by calling 0800 1111 or by registering on the ChildLine website (where you will have access to 1-2-1chat with a counsellor, ChildLine email, and posting on the message boards). You can also find out more about confidentiality at ChildLine.

Want to contact ChildLine?


If you're not sure about what contacting ChildLine is like, watch this short film about what happens when you call us

Boy ang girl walking looking at each other

I’m always arguing with my boyfriend/girlfriend, is this an abusive relationship?
It’s normal to have arguments sometimes in any relationship. When an argument turns violent or your boyfriend/girlfriend keeps putting you down or trying to make you do something you don’t want to, then this is abusive. If this keeps happening to you, you might start to think that it’s normal and you deserve it, but you shouldn’t have to put up with it and you don’t deserve to be treated like this.

If someone is hitting you, hurting you, saying nasty things to you to you or trying to make you do something you don’t want to, then you should speak out about what’s happening. No one should be making you feel upset or scared and no one should be hitting or hurting you in a relationship.

If you are not sure what abuse in a relationship is, you can find more information and videos about abusive relationshipe on the This is abuse website. If you ever need to talk, ChildLine is here for you at any time and we can help you. 

  • How do I break up with someone?

    It's never easy breaking up with someone but there are ways to make it easier. If you are unhappy about something in your relationship, or don't feel the same way about your boyfriend or girlfriend any more, then you might want to end the relationship. Think about how you would feel if it was the other way round and try and make it as painless as possible.

    - Try and tell your boyfriend/girlfriend face to face in a place that is private and quiet, or at least not full of people you both know.
    - Don't break up with them by text, email or letter as this will be really hurtful.
    - Tell your boyfriend/girlfriend why you want to end the relationship.
    - If you don't want to be friends, don't promise that you will be as it will hurt them more if you lie.

  • I’m being pressured into having sex, what should I do?

    Having sex is a big decision. If you don’t feel comfortable or ready to have sex with someone, then you shouldn’t feel like you have to do it. Your boyfriend or girlfriend should care about you enough not to pressure you or make you do something you’re not happy about. Remember that the age of consent in the UK is 16 years old.

    There can be a lot of pressure from other people to have sex and it might seem like everyone else is doing it or talking about it. This shouldn’t be the reason that you start having sex – you should do it because you want to and you are over 16 years old. If you need to talk about sex, you can talk to ChildLine any time.

  • Help, I’ve been dumped!

    Splitting up with someone is never easy and especially if it wasn't your decision. It can be really upsetting if you are the one who is dumped and it takes time to get over it.

    It can be helpful to talk about how you feel to a friend or even a parent. If you feel that you can't talk to anyone, you can call us to speak to someone about how you feel. 

Other sites that can help

Free & confidential information for under 25s
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This is abuse

Let it out
Talk to us

Post a message

Having sex is a big decision and there are lots of things to think about if you are considering doing it. Speak to other young people about sex and relationships on the ChildLine message boards.

Sex and Relationships message board

Talking about sex


It can be really difficult to talk about sex and contraception, as it's a private and personal thing. Everyone has questions or worries about sex and it's normal to feel like this.

Express yourself


Nervous about a new relationship? Or worried about where it's going? You can express how you feel with the Creative Tool.

My Life video


As you're growing up you can often find yourself too old to do all the things you used to do as a kid. But yet too young to be taken seriously? Watch a video about growing up, love and relationships.

How did this help?

How did this information about relationships help you? Was there anything missing?

 
 
 
 
 
Relationships 

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